Is Your Puppy Disobedient or Confused?
- Dale Buchanan
- 23 hours ago
- 6 min read
This is a very important topic, and I get a lot of calls about this. Most owners think their dog is stubborn, ignoring them, or choosing not to listen, but in many cases, the dog is not being disobedient; it is confused. After years of dog training, I have learned that many behavior problems are really communication problems.
Keep in mind also that dogs don't use their ears as well as they use their eyes, and they don't use their eyes as well as they use their nose. If I want to get a dog's attention, I don't talk to them all the time or repeat commands. I'm going to get some high-value food rewards or treats, and I'm going to get them to smell them. Then, they’re going to sit and look at me and wait for their command. They're completely engaged with me and not distracted by anything. That way, they can listen and do what I'm asking them to do.
When they're distracted, they're not going to listen. So the first thing is to get their focus on you, and I suggest that you do that by getting their nose involved. Dogs are going to use their nose first, their eyes second, and their ears third.
Why Confusion Happens
First of all, dogs don't speak English. They don't know the words you're trying to tell them, and they don't know sentences. Each word has to be programmed into their brain, which I call their software.
Here's how you program a word into a dog's software.
You tell them the command
They do the command
You mark it with a yes or the clicker
You reward them with a food reward immediately after the marker.
Remember that dogs will learn through repetition, timing, consistency, and clear consequences.
Common behaviors that create confusion:
Repeating commands multiple times
Changing expectations, day to day. Consistency is key.
Giving commands without following through. If you're not rewarding them when they do something right, they're not likely to keep doing it.
Everyone in the family is doing something different.
I love to talk to my dog in sentences. She's highly trained and obedient. She's six years old, and her name is Dixie. I talk to her in sentences, but I'm not giving her commands. I talk to her, and I sing to her just to make her feel good, and I have nobody in my house to talk to sometimes, so I, instead of talking to the wall, talk to her. She has no idea what I'm saying, but it's all happy, fun stuff.
If I want to give Dixie a command, I say one word: sit, down, stay, come, leave-it, drop-it, or bed. Those are the seven basic commands that I teach in my Dog Obedience Program. We teach all dogs and puppies these commands.
If you say the word sit five times, then the dog will learn that you have to say it five times in order for them to do it. You say, sit, sit, sit, sit, sit. Then the dog finally sits. You give them a reward, and next time you only say it once, and they don’t sit. You programmed the dog to do it after you said it five times.
Another example is a dog that is sometimes allowed on furniture and sometimes corrected. You have to be very clear about boundaries. Dogs aren't allowed on furniture. Dogs aren't allowed to jump on people. Dogs aren't allowed to do other things, like potty in the house. Dogs aren't allowed to run out the front door. You can't allow the dog to do it once in a while. There's going to be problems. From the dog's perspective, the rules are unclear. That's why confusion happens.
Behaviors that owners often label as disobedience
Ignore the recall:
Most puppies or dogs, when they're confused, are going to ignore the recall, especially when they're distracted. If they get out of your house or if they're in the backyard, and they're into something else, they are going to ignore you because they have something else that's more motivating to them than you.
Also, when they come back to you, it has to be a positive experience, not punishment. If they always come to you and they're going to get thrown in the crate, how likely are they to come to you when they're in the backyard having fun? Not very likely.
Pulling on the leash:
Another way that dogs can be disobedient is pulling on the leash. They want to control the walk. They don't want to be partners with you. They get frustrated, so they pull on the leash and do what they want. Also, they're being told to stop the behavior: "No, Dixie, stop. No, don't do that." Believe it or not, they're having fun doing that.
Jumping on guests:
We all know how that goes. Dogs that haven't been trained jump on guests, and the guests say, “Oh, hello. You're so cute. You're so soft,” reinforcing the behavior. That's a big problem.
Slow response to commands:
You give the command, and the dog takes a long time to obey; they are being disobedient. They're not doing it when you want them to. They're doing it when they want to. That can become a problem over time. This part is only true if your puppy has already learned the command.
What Confusion Often Looks Like
Hesitation:
Dogs who hesitate before doing something are confused. They may not know what you want. They may think they're going to do something bad and get punished for it or yelled at, so their confidence is low. They're not going do anything, because it's safer for them than making a mistake.
Looking away or scanning:
A lot of times, dogs won't engage with you because they don't know what you want. They don't know that you're trying to get them to focus on you and give them some guidance and direction, so they're going to look away from you. That's very common.
Performing the wrong behavior:
A lot of times, you'll say to a dog, " Stay, " and then they'll come to you. They don't know what stay means. You have to go back to the basics of programming the stay using distance, duration, distractions, and then work from there.
Only listening in certain environments:
A dog will listen at home. They won't listen outside on walks. They won't listen in public places. This is why we emphasize socialization in our training programs in high-traffic environments like Home Depot, Lowe’s, Tractor Supply, and Hobby Lobby. There are many distractions there. We test the dog's obedience there. It's called generalizing the training so the dog or puppy can learn to obey in all kinds of environments.
A dog that understands clearly responds quickly and confidently. A dog that is confused will hesitate.
What Real Disobedience Actually Looks Like
The dog clearly understands the behavior
The dog has practiced this successfully Many times
The owner is consistent
However, the dog chooses something else. That's the dog being disobedient. The dog knows what to do. You practiced it. They choose not to do it. That's disobedience. That's disobeying. Remember, obedience means they will obey.
This is far less common than confusion because many dogs can't decide whether to disobey. They don't have the brain power to do so. Thats is why confusion is more likely, disobedience is less likely. Most dogs do not try to challenge their owners. No matter how much you think that they do, that's not something that they're good at. They're trying to figure out what works.
How to Reduce Confusion
Make sure that your communication is crystal clear, and don't try to control the dog and micromanage them.
Say commands once. This will help the dog succeed and not fail. When you say the command, once they understand what you want, they do it.
Be consistent with rules. This includes furniture, doors, food, greetings, and leash behavior.
Practice first in low distraction environments. This means your living room, not the dog park or Home Depot.
Reward clearly when the dog gets it right. Timing matters. If the dog does a down perfectly when you ask, you've got to say “yes” and reward that behavior.
Follow through every time. Empty commands. Create unreliable dogs.
Final Thoughts
Make sure that there's value in your commands. If you are giving a lot of gibberish to the dog, and it sounds like Charlie Brown's school teacher, they're not gonna know what you're saying. They're not going to know what you want.
Give the command, and reward the dog immediately when they do it well. Clarity builds confidence. Confident dogs respond faster and behave better. This is how you get a dog to listen to you.
Before assuming your dog is being stubborn or disobedient, ask yourself whether your dog truly understands what you are asking. Confusion is common because of a breakdown in communication. Clear communication fixes many problems with dogs.
If your dog only listens sometimes, responds slowly, or seems inconsistent, the solution is clearly more training and better training. Not another dog trainer or another piece of equipment. You certainly don’t want to use more corrections.
Go back to the drawing board, start over, working from elementary school first, before you expect them to be in college.
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